Thursday, July 27, 2006

Is it really a vacation if I don't leave Columbus??


So, my ma and pa are coming into town tomarrow and we are going to have a little mini-vacation together.

The sperm and egg reserved a hotel room (nuthin' fancy) and we are going to go swimming, sit in the air conditioning, and 'prolly get room service. I haven't seen them in about 6 months, so it should be nice.

Of course, we are staying in Delaware....Ohio. So, I am not really going on much of a vacation. However, I don't have to work. I don't have to pay for dinners. And I get to see my folks and maybe my sister.

I'll talk to ya'll in about 3-4 days. Lates!

Saturday, July 22, 2006

Don't make me go all mental-patient on your ass!

I opened my e-mail today to find I had 31 messages. About 25 of them were comments from my blog. Apparently I have been spammed. I have never eaten spam, but I guess there is a first time for everything. Anyway, I have all these random comments from "anonymous". I saw there was a teeny-tiny link at the bottom of "anonymous' " comments. Don't click on these links as I do not know where they go, or what might happen. I seem to attract computer problems, so if there is a virus on these -- I will get it.

Anyways, the comments are all nice and really positive so I don't think I will enable the verification function just yet. I am going to keep them up too ... At least someone is posting comments.

Maybe they should have spammed my GUEST BOOK too! No one else seems interested in it (*eyes glancing your way*)

*pout*

Friday, July 21, 2006

Rock on!

So, I have created a little radio station for you thank-less (ie: guest book) bitches.


I found this awesome site that allows you to create a playlist, add it to your player, and then add to your blog (or myspace). The best thing is the price -- it's free ya'll!

Right under my profile is a little player. Just click "select station". Click "Lothian's Lair" and it will begin playing. It is randomly playing songs I chose just for you!

I didn't have too much to choose from, so don't look for any 80's metal yet. I do think you will be surprised as my eclectic taste in tunage. Enjoy!!

Monday, July 17, 2006

I call it "times"



Here is a little movie I did. It is more fun with the music on, so just click the little icon and it will play. I did it that way because that damn song was starting to annoy me! Enjoy, bitches!

I got crabs.

Crab Fu

Friday, July 14, 2006

Got a guestbook, bitches

Oh yeah, I am SOOO moving up in the cyber-world! I just added a guestbook at the bottom of my blog. Sign it mofo's! It is right under my counter there. See it? Good. Now sign it.

Sign my guestbook please. I really want you to. Hardly anyone leaves me comments, yet I know you read this. I know because once I say something on here, people at work confront me about it. See watch -- purple nipple licker.

I bet I will go to work and someone will ask me "Lothian, are you mental? Where the hell did 'purple nipple licker' come from?" and I will say, "Beats me. Did you sign my guestbook?"

Have you signed it yet? Probably not because you are still purple reading nipple this licker. Sign it!! You don't even have to think before you say something stupid like purple nipple licker, because I say stupid stuff all the time. Just type something, it can be offensive and inappropriate -- those are the best kinds. I don't care what you write as long as it isn't purple nipple licker.

Thursday, July 13, 2006

Celebhead: Britney

A day in the life of everyone's favorite mom.

Tuesday, July 11, 2006

Not all who wander are lost ... except me.

For some reason, I am feeling very introspective and sad today. I would like to share a poem from The Lord Of The Rings: The Two Towers by J.R.R. Tolkien that keeps scrolling over and over in head.

Somehow it is reflecting my state of mind right now.


Where now the horse and the rider? Where is the horn that was blowing?

Where is the helm and the hauberk, and the bright hair flowing?

Where is the hand on the harpstring, and the red fire glowing?

Where is the spring and the harvest and the tall corn growing?

They have passed like rain on the mountain, like a wind in the meadow;

The days have gone down in the West behind the hills into shadow.

Who shall gather the smoke of the dead wood burning,

Or behold the flowing years from the Sea returning?



I think my "red fire glowing" is going out.

Sunday, July 02, 2006

Post #77

I am a sucker for these quizzes.

1. When was the last time you shaved?
Today, after many many days of not shaving.
2. What is your favorite flavor of JELLO?
Green. what is that, lime?
3. Do you enjoy looking at your myspace profile?
It is my guilty pleasure. Reading that and my blog.
4. What does your favorite candle smell like?
Fresia or rain.
5. Are you any good at math?
Hell to the no.
6. Are any of your great-grandparents still alive?
Sadly, no.
7. When was the last time you spoke in front of a large group of people?
Gosh, probably college sometime. I am sure I repressed the whole traumatic thing.
8. Who should get number one on People magazines sexiest list?
Colin "Fuck me" Farrell. As for the ladies, I would say Angelina Jolie. She is perfection.
9. What is one of your favorite things to do when it's cold outside?
Snuggle in a cozy, warm sweater.
10. What is one of your favorite things to do when it's hot outside?
Complain and sit in front of the fan/air conditioner.
11. What was the last TV show you watched?
Some crazy documentary on killer jellyfish.
12. Do you have any famous ancestors?
That depends on what they are famous for...
13. Do you sleep with the door to your room open or closed?
Cracked open a wee bit.
14. Do you have a secret identity?
Of course, and she is a Hobbit.
15. Have you ever sniffed magic markers?
What, like today?
16. What was one of your favorite toys as a child?
I have a family of three bears: mama, papa and baby. I still sleep with them on my bed.
17. Are you good at cooking anything in particular?
I kick dessert's ass!
18. Do you have any injuries right now?
Carpal Tunnel is acting up, and my ... heart ...
19. Do you have a credit card?
Yes, just don't ask if they are maxed or not.
20. Have you ever taken out a loan to pay for school?
Unfortunately, yes. And I can't pay it now.
21. Do you know the words to the song on your myspace profile?
Every last one of them. Do I know the worlds to the Star Spangled Banner? Not so much.
22. Do you have DSL, cable or dialup?
Isn't DSL and Cable the same thing? I have one of those.
23. Do you ever leave messages on people's answering machines/voice mail?
Yes, like a rambling idiot.
24. Have you ever wanted to look like someone else?
I still do. Anyone else but me.
25. What's your favorite frozen treat?
Ice Cream, bitches!
26. Are you an organized person?
I thought I had the answer to that question in this file here, but I don't see it now. Maybe in that box over there? Nope. I know it was just here a minute ago, can you lift up that pile of papers over there and see if it is underneath??
27. Do you think you have an OCD about anything?
Yep, but not in a terrible and agonizing disorder way, but in a cute "Monk"-ish way. (you know, the TV show)
28. Who did you lose your CONCERT virginity to (I said concert you pervs)?
First concert was The Monkees at the Canfield Fair. Followed many years later by New Kids On The Block. Opening act? -- Weird AL!
29. What are your guilty pleasures?
Myspace, Dog the Bounty Hunter, Chocolate, Mr goodvibrations ... oh wait...
30. Are you a fast reader?
No, I analyze too much.
31. Have you ever put "yes please" by sex on something you had to fill out (i.e. job application, standardized test...)?
God, I am such a dork...
32. Have you ever vandalized anything?
Yes. I tend to vandalize/destroy at work. I think I have an issue or five.
33. Are you afraid or bothered by something that others find strange?
I have to wash packaged underwear before I wear them.
34. Do you draw your name in the sand when you go to the beach?
Sure.
35. Do you use Twizzlers as straws?
No, I use them to snort my cocaine.
36. What's the most painful dental procedure you've had?
Getting braces on and off. I hate teeth!
37. Can you name all 50 states?
There are fifty?
38. Is there a celebrity that you would like to punch in the face?
Ann Coulter and all the other homophobic, racist, sexist, and hate spewing pieces of shit that pollute our earth in the name of God or the government.
39. Have you ever stepped on something sharp and had it go through your foot?
Yikes, no.
40. Have you ever been stung by a jellyfish?
No, but did you know there are killer jellyfish ... (seeing if you are paying attention)
41. What's one of the dumbest home remedies that you've heard of?
Drawing a blank.
42. Have you ever saved anyone's life?
I don't think so. I couldn't deal with it even if I did -- too much responsibility.
43. Do you like what the ocean does to your hair?
I like everything that the ocean does except kill people.
44. Have you ever received one of those big tins of 3 different kinds of popcorn for Christmas?BITCH I bought myself one last year!!!
45. Have you ever been to a planetarium?
No, but would LOVE LOVE LOVE To go. Does that make me a nerd?
46. Do you use a lot of salt?
Only when I want a little popcorn with my salt.
47. Is your closet organized?
What closet? Everything I own is strewn all over the floor.
48. What is a funny sound to you?
Little kids laughing -- it is as contagious as bird flu.
49. Have you ever been complimented on something other than your looks?
Yes... on my writing skills
50. Do you re-use towels after you shower?
Yes. Am I gross?